I didn't read the whole thread....but I'll respond to your first post.
I'm a new inexperienced ham operator. I'm 34. I'll give my perspective. You're right, it doesn't appeal to anyone anymore. Kids today grow up with cellphones and laptops than can talk to people half a world away a lot cheaper and easier. Why would they be interested in us trying to show them century old technology? The ones that are interesting in engineering will be.
I have a few years electronics engineering education. Therefor I have an interest in engineering, and HOW IT WORKS. 99% of the population doesn't care about HOW something works, as long as they know it works and its difficult to convince them its important. I feel engineering students and geeks will always be into stuff like this. Unfortunately I forgot half of what I learned by now.... My 92 year old grandfather sort of got me into radio at a young age, then when I got older I have a really smart/geeky friend that got me interested again....but I already learned a lot of the basics in school. I'm also a bit of a "survivalist" at heart. My grandpa gave me his radio a year or 2 ago as his health is failing.
Everyone at the testing center was happy I showed up, and were enthusiastic about the hobby but you're right they pretty much said get your license and have fun! I got my general...and that was it.
I got a radio, and had no idea what to do. My smart buddy helped me mount a couple antennas and gave me the crash course. The learning curve is high, and a lot of the really knowledgeable folk have little patience for talking newbies thru it, and explaining questions and stuff we have. I'm from the internet generation, and am used to looking things up online, but online and on the radio itself, some people tend to look down their nose at people who are just trying to learn.
My advice is, if you want people to join up, TOLERATE their uninformed questions, and if the question is wrong or stupid, EXPLAIN why its the wrong question, politely.
Overall so far, my experience has been mostly positive, but I only use the radio once in a while and forget things and need to ask a dumb question once in a while and some people have been really unhelpful.
This hobby will continue to get smaller and smaller unless we do ALL we can to encourage it. The inquisitive kid still will always wonder how and why his wi-fi works, and what led to it being invented. Nurture those kids. They are asking the dumb question because they are not as smart as you, but the interest is there or they wouldn't be asking. Help them learn to BE as smart as you someday. Its hard for me to answer old timers PC questions as I'm an IT guy, but I taught my 92 year old grandpa that gave me the radio to use a PC! He's still learning though too.